"Pamela Bondi" - Marsh Family parody of "The One and Only" sung by Chesney Hawkes (by Nik Kershaw)

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“The One and Only” was written by Nik Kershaw and became a number one hit in the UK in 1991 as Chesney Hawkes’s debut single – with its relentless upbeat vibe, confidence, chucky electric guitars, and typical late 80s digital piano and pads. It featured in movies on either side of the pond.

Hopefully most of the references in our adaptation of the song are self-explanatory, but for those who haven’t seen it, this week Pam Bondi issued legal guidance supported Trump’s acceptance of the gift of a luxury jet worth c.$400 million from the Qatari royal family (to be used as the most lavish Air Force One ever). Bondi herself was formerly a Qatar lobbyist, and by coincidence, the Trump Organisation last month announced an eye-watering deal to build a luxury golf resort in the country, which Trump is currently visiting to cultivate business deals. Even conservative commentators (such as Ben Shapiro, Laura Loomer, Mark Levin) have been critical of the luxury jet. The US Constitution, of course, precludes officials from accepting gifts to avoid the dangers of undue influence and corruption. (In the same way that insider trading is illegal – though hard to prove. Pam Bondi sold between $1 and $5 million worth of shares of Trump Media on the same day that, after markets closed, Donald Trump unveiled sweeping new tariffs that caused a stock market plummet.)

While impressively tolerant in some ways Trump, his supporters, or campaign funders are involved (dropping cases, closing a cryptocurrency unit, pausing prosecutions of businesses charged with violations of the 1977 Foreign Corrupt Practices Act), Bondi’s approach to the Justice Department has been much harsher in others – firing or forcing out lawyers after issuing a memo setting up a “weaponization working group” at the Department of Justice [DoJ] and threatening judges who defy the agenda that “we will come after you.” She has also revoked journalists’ free-speech protections around identifying their sources. Lastly, on immigration, her Justice Department has operated contrary to the federal courts in many of its deportation claims and actions, resulting in flagrant miscarriages of justice that will likely prompt new legal showdowns to come.

For some background info we mobilised for the song, see: - https://www.newsweek.com/fact-check-pam-bondi-dog-hurricane-katrina-1991251 - https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025/may/02/trump-doj-pam-bondi - https://www.nytimes.com/2025/05/12/us/politics/pam-bondi-trump-justice-dept.html - https://edition.cnn.com/2025/05/14/politics/bondi-justice-department-trump-qatar-747 - https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/ckg4zk22n9wo - https://www.propublica.org/article/pam-bondi-trump-media-stock-tariffs

___________________________ LYRICS

She’s Pam, Pamela Bondi! Bondi authorises planes, oh Bondi’s unencumbered: She can do it The Constitution is no blockage to it

You bet a bribe can be a huge jet Who says it’s a scam?! Qatari Pam knows best Al-Air Force One’s now on request!

Hot damn - Pamela Bondi Attorney or Secret Police? Can’t stand dissent or scrutiny She’s purging that judiciary

She’s been amazing as an AG At weaponizing loyalty Her role embraces Dragging folk to far off places

Who knows what destinations? Stokes fears – But loves donations Maybe the rule of law has died… But they’ll make shedloads on the side

Yes ma’am! Pamela Bondi No thought for legality She can defend her cronies Or grant them full immunity

She can’t bear the Federal Courts With all their civil rights(es) She’ll target journalists of course Or any criticisers

No one can read a memorandum As sinister as her one! The D.O.J. is through You grift for Trump - Pam tells you to!

Who’s Pam, Pamela Bondi? Trump’s fallback as nominee Once nabbed somebody’s doggy But gave it back (eventually)!

She’ll stamp disgusting jobbery While blocking transparency Thanks Pam, for chaperoning A new bar for depravity

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THANKS SO MUCH TO PATREONS (HOWLERS BELOW):

Alyssa Sangeeta Jacobson Memorial Fund Douglas Lind Dorettas Dozen Christian Schranz Bond Starker Peter Green Richard Boultbee LisaMarie Fitzpatrick Ed Rocheck Sandra Vernooy Dan McColm David Ryan Simon Haslam Lew Mike Smith Andy Riches Cliff Hope Carol Leff Derrick Brown David Patrao Karen & Geeta Grandad